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Shari Fish - Issue 7, Nov 1, 2011
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Don't DefineDiscover
Are you the smart,
pretty, funny, or quirky one? Are you a hard worker, a slacker, or a nerd? From infancy, we are defined by others: She
is such an easy baby (compared to who?), He is so smart (by whose standards?). Later, we struggle to define ourselves as
the athlete, the techie, the prep, or the intellect. Throughout our lives and in different environments, our definitions
of ourselves change.
How do you define yourself, or should I ask, how do you limit yourself? When we try to "define" who we
are and what we will become, we impose needless limitations on ourselves and our possibilities. We label ourselves so early
in our lives that our perceived limitations are more likely to become reality due to lack of exposure, experience, or confidence,
rather than innate talent. Can you imagine living with the same technology that you had twenty years ago? Then why should
you live with the same personal limitations that you set in the 80s? As the world is changing, growing, and advancing, you
can too.
What are your misguided perceptions and assumptions that keep you from stepping out of your comfort zone? By identifying
and addressing our personal definitions, we bring them to a state of conscious awareness where we are able to objectively
address them. Just because you have never been an athlete doesnt mean that you shouldnt try yoga or run a 5-K. Just because
you couldnt draw a stick figure in high school, doesnt mean you wouldnt enjoy an art class. I have clients who are exercising
for the first time in their lives, returning to school, changing careers, and quitting smoking. How about my ninety-five year
old grandma who reads her books on an Amazon Kindle!! While the discovery process often brings on feelings of vulnerability
and fear, it is from that perspective that growth ensues.
It is time to stop "defining" ourselves, and begin to "discover" all of our amazing, confusing,
and often conflicting aspects. By living our lives in a quest for self-discovery and personal growth, we recognize that life
is full of opportunities. While we may not know exactly where we will land, the fun is in the journey.
Join me and together we will challenge our definitions and begin the process of self-discovery. Each moment, we
have an opportunity to discover something new about ourselves. When we spend our time and energy on people and endeavors that
interest and engage us, we create opportunities and relationships that we never anticipated. While honoring our values, the
discovery process is sure to add joy, love, and excitement to our lives! Be well.
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 Feeling Homesick?!
If youre missing home and having dreams of Thanksgiving or Winter Break, let me assure you that youre not alone!
Most college students experience feelings of homesickness some time during their college career, with the feelings often intensifying
mid-semester as academic, time, financial, and social stresses escalate. As the newness of the semester wears off and reality
sets in, you may question your college decision, your preparation, your major, even your roommate. Perhaps you are merely
craving a homemade meal, miss your dog, or wish someone would do your laundry! Regardless, homesickness is real and it is
NORMAL! In a recent survey, 62.7% of college freshman frequently or occasionally felt lonely or homesick. However, homesickness does
not need to have a lasting negative impact,.
Energy flows where your attention goes. is a mantra worth remembering. When homesick feelings begin to surface,
you can make a conscious decision to redirect your attention, and thus your energy. That is certainly easier said than done,
but here are some suggestions:
- Write
down five things that you are grateful for. Gratitude redirects your focus and allows a positive perspective to emerge.
- Identify a way that you can get involved and help someone else by tutoring, mentoring,
or perhaps through a philanthropy or religious group on campus.
- Take time to connect with a friend and/or roommate: go for a walk or out for a cup
of coffee or fro-yo.
- Limit your time on FB and/or following old friends; you will have time to reconnect
over winter break. Instead, spend that time connecting on campus or in the community.
- Oftentimes, when you name and identify an emotion, it calms down. However, if homesickness
persists, seek out a counselor at your schools mental health office; they are experienced and there to help.
- Be patient and persistent. Transitions take time and they are seldom perfect but, with
patience and persistence, you will reap amazing rewards!
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 Salmon
with Warm Lentil Salad
(Real Simple, 12-09)
This is fast, healthy, and delicious! I highly recommend it (as does my husband, which is always a good sign)!
1 cup green lentils,
rinsed
2 tablespoons plus 1 teaspoon olive oil
1 ¼ pounds skinless salmon fillet, cut into 4 pieces
2 tablespoons red wine vinegar
2 teaspoons Dijon mustard
¼ red onion, finely chopped
1 bunch arugula (or spinach), torn (about 4 cups)
1 lemon, cut into wedges
- Prepare lentils, as directed on package.
- Meanwhile, heat 1 teaspoon of the oil in a large nonstick skillet over medium-high heat.
Season the salmon with ¼ teaspoon each salt and pepper sand cook until opaque throughout, 4-5 minutes per side.
- In a large bowl, combine the vinegar, mustard, onion, the remaining 2 tablespoons of
oil, and salt and pepper (if desired).
- Add the lentils and arugula (or spinach) to the vinaigrette and toss to combine. Serve
with the salmon and lemon wedges.
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Your One Body
Warren Buffet
asks us to imagine how we would treat our car if it had to last us throughout our lifetime. Hmm how about our bodies?! After
all, we only get one body!
Most of us are already acutely aware of the importance of eating right but few of us actually do. It seems so difficult but
in truth it is quite easy, even during the school day. Here are four simple guidelines that have a huge impact:
- Fill up on fruits, veggies, whole grains and lean proteins.
- Choose unprocessed foods vs. processed foods. (If you dont know what is in the food, or if the
ingredients sound like a science experiment, it is probably not good for you!)
- Nix the mayo, and creamy dressing and sauces.
- Swap sugary drinks and diet sodas for water, tea, low-fat milk and flavored waters.
With that in mind, check
out this great article: Parenting Healthy Lunches for Teens: 100 Nutritious Brown Bag Lunch ideas.
Enjoy!!
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 Fiteens 2012 Pre-College Workshops
Spring/Summer 2012
Houston
Austin
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Shari L.
Fish, M.Ed,
Certified Wellness Coach
Shari Fish began her career in the corporate world in 1985 after graduating with a degree in accounting from the University
of Texas at Austin and earning her CPA in 1987. After working for Arthur Andersen, Silicon Systems, Inc. and independently
as a CPA, she put her career on hold to raise her three children.
Shari returned to graduate school and earned her Masters in Educational Psychology/ Counseling at the University of Houston.
She chose a unique course of study, spending a full semester independently studying the relationship between exercise and
the brain.
After earning her Masters degree, Shari began to utilize her understanding of the mind/body connection to help individuals
create fuller, healthier lives. She completed her practicum at the nationally renowned KIPP Academy middle and high schools,
where she counseled students and facilitated a variety of self-esteem, anger management and life-skills groups. The following
year, she joined Wellspring Community Programs as a Cognitive Behavioral Therapy facilitator, where she successfully led high
school students through an educational and motivational weight loss program.
Shari completed her Wellness Coach training and certification through
Wellcoaches Corporation and participated in the distinguished Harvard Medical School and Mc Lean Hospitals Coaching in Medicine
and Leadership Conference and the International Coaching Federation Conference. She is a member of the American Psychological
Association, the International Positive Psychology Association, and the Houston Wellness Association.
Taking a page from her own consulting practice, Shari balances her work life with being a wife of 25 years and a mother of
three college-age children. Shari brings to her practice a first-hand understanding of the challenges faced when attempting
to create and maintain balance through lifes many transitions. Based on the principles of Positive Psychology, Shari helps
clients to clarify their values and motivators, and to celebrate their personal strengths and past successes. It is from this
perspective, that clients are able to achieve the lasting change that they desire and to create a more balanced and fulfilling
life. It is Sharis desire that each of her clients experience increased life satisfaction, self-efficacy, and truly become
his/her best self.
Shari is available for private consultation, speaking engagements, and workshops.
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Shari's WellNotes:
