ISSN 1234-5678
February, 2009
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Change It Up

We generally awaken each morning and quickly consider, what do I have to do today? Most of the time, our list is quite lengthy. For some, it is filled with work obligations. For others its family, home, or school obligations. And for many, its all of the above; however, we know that life is about much more than getting things done and crossing tasks off our to do lists. With summer soon upon us, we can probably all point to at least one have to that will fall off our list for a few months, if not permanently. It may be a monthly meeting that takes a summer hiatus, a morning carpool, or a team sport.

As you begin to anticipate these schedule changes, how about replacing have tos with want tos? How do you want to spend these extra hours or days? Is there a book or two that you have wanted to read? A new activity that you want to try? Would you like to experiment with some new recipes? Take a pilates class?

Two summers ago, I took a couple of yoga classes with my daughter, Stephanie, as an opportunity to try something new and to share a healthy activity together. While Stephanie didnt enjoy it, I still love to attend yoga class on Sunday afternoons. The following summer, we decided to try a Zumba dance class together; while my 46 year old body did not feel it, Stephanie definitely has Latin roots somewhere. She had a blast as she completely out-danced me! While routines are valuable, and in many cases necessary, a change of routine adds energy and depth to our lives. Consider going for a walk after dinner, sleeping an extra hour on Friday mornings, launching a home improvement project, or working on some long-forgotten scrap books

Lets make a pact to get out of our ruts this summer. Lets shake things up, even if its in only the smallest way.

Delicious Pasta with Sausage and Arugula
(from EatingWell.com)

Prep Time: 10 minutes
Cook Time: 30 minutes

Ingredients: 12 ounces whole wheat pasta shells or twists
8 ounces Italian turkey sausage
3 cloves garlic
8 cups arugula ( I added spinach, as well)
2 cups cherry tomatoes
½ cup parmesan cheese
1 teaspoon of black ground pepper
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil

Bring a large pot of water to a boil. Cook pasta until just tender, 9-11 minutes.

Meanwhile, cook sausage in a large nonstick skillet over medium-high heat, breaking it into small pieces with a wooden spoon, until cooked through, about 5 minutes. Stir in garlic, arugula (spinach) and tomatoes. Cook, stirring often, until the greens wilt and the tomatoes begin to break down, about 3 minutes. Remove from heat; cover and keep warm.

Combine ½ cup of cheese, pepper and salt in a large bowl. Measure ½ cup of the cooking liquid; drain the pasta. Whisk the cooking liquid and oil into the cheese mixture; add the pasta and toss to combine. Serve the pasta topped with the sausage mixture and an extra sprinkle of cheese, if desired.

Nutrition: Calories, 352, Saturated Fat 3g, Sodium 283mg, Dietary Fiber 6g, Total Fat 9g, Carbs 47g, Cholesterol 26mg, Protein 18g

A Sizzling Summer

Its almost summer! With the school year coming to a close, whats on your mind? Sleeping in? Travel? Camp? A summer job? Volunteering? Whatever it is, let me put one thought in your mind: ask yourself, Am I engaging compulsively or meaningfully? In todays world, teens feel so much pressure to do all and be all, that they often find little enjoyment or meaning in anything that they do. College admissions committees are beginning to realize, however, that it is not the breadth of a candidates experiences that matters, but rather, the depth. While the teen years are a wonderful time to explore new things, it is important to seek out opportunities that potentially interest and excite you. Enriching experiences means something different to everyone: interesting, inspiring, challenging, meaningful, and perhaps scary! As the summer quickly approaches, I encourage you to ask yourself, What is going to get me out of bed on a hot summer day? What is going to make my summer sizzle? How can I enrich myself and most importantly, enjoy doing it?

A Client's Wellness Journey Sharing her Positive Conclusion

During my last session with Shari we realized that I had officially been working with her for three months. Now, if you recall, in my first session with her back in mid-October Shari instructed me to set a few three-month goals. And folks, much to my surprise, I accomplished every single one of them!

Goal #1

I am exercising five times per week for 45 minutes. Okay, honestly, I am not working out five times a week; I am working out three to four times a week. Now, the old me would have considered this a failure. But Shari has taught me to look at the wins instead of the losses. And the thing is, I wasnt exercising at all back in October, so the fact that exercise is a regular part of my life now is a huge accomplishment. I may not be spending hours in the gym, but I am leading a more active lifestyle. I play basketball at home, I ride my bike around the neighborhood, I go for walks or runs, and I do workout DVDs in my bedroom. These are all things that dont take up too much time, that fit nicely into my life, and after which I feel really good about myself. Plus, as Shari has helped me see, exercise is helping me to be more mentally alert when I study (for the Bar Exam). And the thing about exercise, it isnt rocket science; you just have to do it to reap the benefits.

Goal #2

I am eating 3-4 small meals a day and am no longer binging. This was the most difficult goal to reach. Ive lived a long life of binging. Food comforted me when I was down or scared or anxious, and it provided me something to do when I was bored or avoiding the work I didnt want to do. And there is nothing like eating a whole pizza to take your mind off of whatever is bothering you. How can you think of how much your heart aches when youre eating delicious cheeses melted on top of doughy bread? And then, when your stomach feels like it might explode, how can you think of how sad you are when youre focusing all of your energy on how much you hate yourself for eating that pizza? Its a sick cycle, but one that had become a way of life for me. And honestly, on the flip side of the coin, there was something so oddly satisfying about denying myself what I wanted until I could take it no longer and gave into weeks of deprivation and cravings. But now, I dont do that anymore. I mean, sure, every now and then I do eat a few more bites of food than I need to, but I immediately recognize what Im doing and I put a stop to it. Now, as a general rule, I eat much healthier foods, and my meals are smaller but more frequent. The real key has been that I try not to let myself get too hungry. That being said, I havent cut anything out of my diet. I still have dessert sometimes. I still eat cheese and bread my real weaknesses. But I dont live off of those foods. For the first time in my life, I understand what moderation feels like. And as an added bonus, over the past three months I have lost 17 pounds. Its not a lot of weight, I grant you, but its real, lifestyle-change weight loss. I didnt have to diet for those pounds to drop; they just came off because I was living a healthier lifestyle.

Goal #3

I am going to sleep at an hour that allows me 7 1/2 8 hours of sleep per night. It probably seems like a silly goal to you, right? I get that. But see, Ive wanted to change my sleeping habits for pretty much my entire life. Ive always been a night owl, but frankly, not a very productive one. I would stay up late watching TV or cleaning or talking on the phone, whatever, because I didnt look forward to bedtime. Going to sleep made me anxious. Im sure, psychologically speaking, its residual childhood stuff, the details of which I wont bore you. Suffice it to say, Ive never been someone who could just place my head on a pillow and instantly fall asleep. For me, bedtime has always been a source of stress and so I would watch TV until I couldnt force my eyelids to stay open any longer. The result was a crappy nights sleep and very few hours of sleep overall. But now, by finally taking control of this issue, I actually look forward to bedtime. I sleep well and for a solid 8-8 ½ hours each night. The trick has been waking up and going to bed at the same time every day, even on the weekends. I used to sleep in on the weekends; I dont anymore. Maybe Ill give myself an extra half hour if I really feel indulgent, but other than that, Im up and at em by 7:00 AM every day. My body also now recognizes that its time to wind down around 9:00 PM; thats when I start my bedtime ritual. Then its lights out by 10:00 PM, 10:30 PM at the latest. It may seem a little lame and rigid, but Ive never felt so rested in my life. Ive also never before enjoyed going to sleep as much as I do now.

Goal #4

I am sending out a résumé or making a new contact three times per week. Okay, we ended up tweaking this goal about mid-way through November when I signed up for the Texas Bar Exam. So instead of networking and sending out my résumé multiple times a week, I am studying for the Bar every single day and attending a Bar-prep course. So far, the course is going really well. Ive made some friends in the class and were all helping each other out, mostly in terms of morale. Shari and I have been tweaking my studying schedule as I go along, but recently we hit on a plan thats been working really nicely for me. Again, without boring you too much, I workout in the morning, go to class until noon-ish, take a break/eat lunch, then I go to a café and study for several hours. This works for me because when I get home I know that the days work is done and I can relax. I know that as the Bar gets closer, though, my schedule will get more rigorous. But this is a marathon, not a race, so all in good time.

Goal #5

I am maintaining permeable boundaries with my family, specifically my mother and my sister. This goal wasnt actually part of my three-month goals, but it was part of my original Vision Statement. I didnt mention it in my three-month goals because, well honestly, it seemed like too much to hope for. I didnt think that in such a short amount of time, so much could have changed within my family. But I was wrong. And boy am I glad I was wrong! The tides have really turned for my mother and sister and myself. Were communicating like adults and focusing on making our relationships better and healthier. As a result, my sister and I are currently angst-free and my mom and I are building a relationship based on mutual respect and love instead of guilt and codependency. This, I must say, is the accomplishment that means the most to me.

So what do all of these accomplishments mean? They demonstrate one very important thing: Im on the right track. Shari has put me on the right track. With her guidance and motivation, I have successfully changed my life in a very real way in just three short months. On the outside, I might look the same to most people. But on the inside, where it really counts, I am different. I am happier, stronger, and more confident. And I am excited as all get-out to see what the future has in store for me!

While earning her Masters degree in Educational Psychology/Counseling, Shari was taught that in order to understand clients issues," you must first closely examine their maladaptive behaviors and/or past missteps. However, being a pragmatic and optimistic person, she was searching for a more efficient, effective and positive means to help her clients create healthier, richer and more balanced lives. Thus began her personal and professional journey into wellness coaching. Based on the principles of Positive Psychology, Shari helps clients to clarify their values and motivators, and to celebrate their personal strengths and past successes. It is from this perspective, that clients are able to achieve the lasting change they desire and to create a more balanced life.

It is Shari's desire that each of her clients experience increased life satisfaction, self-efficacy and truly become his/her best self."